We are all winners, undoubtedly.  Whatever we do, whenever we create an action – we must win.

Well, not really.

Since the childhood we are taught and pushed to be the best. Get a grade A or B, at least C. Like the D, E or even F don’t exist. We are pushed through countless tests and exams, and being challenged on daily basis.

And there is always somebody, who in a good faith has to say that “you won” even though we actually did not.

Mr Goleman in his book, Emotional Intelligence, presented controversial at the time of publishing, study that the IQ isn’t the determinant of our intelligence. Instead, the emotional intelligence is.

So what defines the emotional intelligence? Cutting a long (and brilliant!) story short, emotional intelligence is how the person can understand, express and control emotions of self and others.

Let’s look around, definitively you can name a few school mates amongst whom some of them had been scoring great grades, some average and some were low. According to IQ, the better the grades, the better the life standard should be, shouldn’t it?

However, life varies, and so often we find those best scoring folks not getting the best positions. Quite often it’s the opposite.

The average and average-low scoring fellows often become employers rather than employees or get senior positions whereas, those with high IQs can’t adjust. The first question that comes is: How come? That’s where EI comes.

People who are just “average” very often have a way better emotional skills than the wizz kids, they can handle themselves and people around the in more efficient way. Make their way through the crowd of others not-single-out guys.

I’ve read that book a few years ago and still can find useful thoughts in it. I’ll read it again, soon.